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IS A HUMBLE MAN A WEAK MAN?

By Terry Loving

“Do not be called leaders; for One is your Leader, that is, Christ. “But the greatest among you shall be your servant. “Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted.”

Matthew 23:10-12

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“He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?”

(Michah 6:8)

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“Ultimately, societies must challenge the impossible-to-achieve demands of manhood and the patriarchal structures that underpin these demands.  We need to redefine notions of manhood and find alternative masculine identities that are not destructive to women and men alike.  This is a long-term prospect but it starts by changing the way we – both women and men – raise boys to be men.” 1

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While researching information as to why many men and young males put so much effort into acquiring a tough persona, I came across the following question:

What is the difference between a “bad boy” and a “thug?”

One commenter stated that the difference was “a misdemeanor” verses “a felony.” Meaning, the “bad boy” would most likely commit crimes that amounted to misdemeanors such as tagging a wall; disorderly conduct; reckless driving and public intoxication. Of course this would depend on the jurisdiction in which these crimes were committed.

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 The “thug” is more likely to commit a felony such as murder, assault, battery, and false imprisonment, etc. A felony charge is a more serious charge that usually results in longer jail time, and in many cases, the death penalty.  Again, this depends on the jurisdiction. Another commenter defined ex-President Bill Clinton as a “bad boy” siting his involvement with Monica Lewinsky. It was noted that “bad boys” cheat on their mates, but thugs likewise – right?

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 It is also said that, “Women are drawn to “bad boys” like a moth to a flame? Why?

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 To confuse this issue further, another Author penned an article explaining The Difference Between A Thug And A Gangster.

“Where gangsters were gentleman criminals, a thug was a negative term used for murderers, rapists and thieves. To be a thug meant you carried the stigma of being shady, ruthless and dangerously criminal. A gang of thugs are not gangsters, they are a gang. Unlike gangster, thug is not romanticized in the English language no matter how much these rappers try to tell you different. Some women have adapted the word as almost a term of endearment for the “bad boys” that they pursue. I guess being referred to as a thug feels a bit better than being called a “bad boy” but let’s be real here, it’s the exact same thing. Thugs are not gangsters, thugs are bad boys – ie: they are guys playing “dress-up” to look the part of a thug. Real thugs will shoot you, rob you, rape you and they do get locked up. Turn on the show Gangland, or Gang Nation and you will see true thugs. Most of these women claiming to “like thugs” could not handle a real thug. They like bad boys, so let’s stop with the facade.”

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Bad_boys_1983

 Is it any wonder that men are confused concerning their masculinity? They don’t know whether to choose to imitate Al Capone (a gangster), a thug like those in the movie Goodfellas, or the bad boys in the movie Bad Boys starring Sean Penn. On the other hand, men and young males who exhibit any sort of humility are accused of being “soft,” “momma’s boys,” “weak.” “sissified,” and just plain cowardly. Our society raises boys to not show their emotions, especially crying. They are taught to “man-up” at a young age, and are expected as adults to be the bread winners, macho in their homes, and never to back down from a fight with another male.

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“Violence against women is closely linked to the rigid norms that define what it is to be a man.  Worldwide there is a dominant model of manhood; men are taught to aspire to and judge themselves based on this ideal. Men are expected to be financially independent, become husbands and fathers, be the primary income earner for the family, be achievers in the eyes of peers, and be in control and exert authority.  These salient norms of manhood are perpetuated by societies, communities, peers, families and women themselves – and take on more extreme forms in some cultures.”

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DeeboDEEBO – Neighborhood thug in the movie “Friday”

“But for most men, particularly poor men, there is a huge gap between these expectations and what they can achieve. In the face of chronic poverty, inequality, exclusion, jobless economies, many men feel they don’t measure up.  How then, do these men prove themselves as men?  All too often it is through the use of force and violence – and female partners are easy targets.  Such behavior is often the only way for many men to wield power in societies where they are made to feel powerless and useless.  This is the hard reality that remains unacknowledged or misunderstood in much of the discussion on gender violence today.” 2

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I love bad boys

Men may feel “they don’t measure up” in many situations, but how does violence prove manhood? How does forcing women to be under their control make a man feel powerful? Why does a man have to wear a label such as “Alpha-Male,” “macho,” “thug,” “bad boy,” or “gangster” to prove he is a man? Chronic poverty, inequality, exclusion, and jobless economies no doubt have a negative impact on any culture, but why beat the woman who is standing by your side? Is she not suffering the effects as well? Why rape your children, especially little girls and justify this behavior as a way of exhibiting so-called manhood? If a man feels that violence and abuse raises the bar of his manhood, he deceives only himself.

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“In reality there is perhaps not one of our natural passions so hard to subdue as pride. Disguise it, struggle with it, beat it down, stifle it, mortify it as much as one pleases, it is still alive, and will every now and then peep out and show itself…For even if I could conceive that I had completely overcome it, I should probably be proud of my humility.”Benjamin Franklin

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“When pride comes, then comes dishonor, But with the humble is wisdom.” Proverbs 11:2

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Chicago+Gangsters

If a male lacks vision and guidance as to what a “real” man is, he should look to Jesus Christ as the ultimate example of true manhood. Jesus was the humblest man who ever walked the earth. And yet, the most powerful!

“Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS.  Matthew ll:29

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It is said of Jesus Christ:

… “he humbled himself: by becoming man, and by various outward actions in his life; as subjection to his parents, working at the trade of a carpenter, conversing with the meanest of men, washing his disciples’ feet, &c. and the whole of his deportment both to God and man, his compliance with his Father’s will, though disagreeable to flesh and blood, his behaviour towards his enemies, and his forbearance of his disciples, showed him to be of a meek and humble spirit; he humbled himself both to God and man:”

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gangsters

… “and became obedient unto death, or “until death”; for he was obedient from the cradle to the cross, to God, to men, to his earthly parents, and to magistrates; he was obedient to the ceremonial law, to circumcision, the passover, &c. to the moral law, to all the precepts of it, which he punctually fulfilled; and to the penalty of it, death, which he voluntarily and cheerfully bore, in the room and stead of his people:”   Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible

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“Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.” James 4:10

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“Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord,…. Which is done, when men, before the Lord, and from their hearts, and in the sincerity of their souls, acknowledge their meanness and unworthiness, their vileness, sinfulness, and wretchedness, and implore the grace and mercy of God in Christ, as did Abraham, Jacob, Job, Isaiah, Paul, and the publican; and when they walk humbly with God, acknowledging they can do nothing without him; owning their dependence on his grace, and ascribing all they have, and are, unto it:

and he shall lift you up; this is God’s usual way to lift up the meek, and exalt those that humble themselves; he lifts them from the dunghill, to set them among princes; he gives them a place, and a name in his house, better than sons and daughters; he adorns them with his grace; he clothes them with the righteousness of his Son, he grants them nearness to himself; and at last will introduce them into his kingdom and glory.” Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible

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gangsters-paradise

The power and control men desire is of the world, limited and self-projected. Gangs who claim neighborhoods as if they built them themselves have limited control over their freedom for they dare not venture onto enemy turf. The thugs function within a small radius compared to the rest of the world, and most likely depend upon drug sales for a living. They sell death to each other, and kill for little to no reason. In the sense of the word “freedom,” they are not free.

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“So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed. John 8:36

“Christ spoke of spiritual liberty; but carnal hearts feel no other grievances than those that molest the body, and distress their worldly affairs. Talk to them of their liberty and property, tell them of waste committed upon their lands, or damage done to their houses, and they understand you very well; but speak of the bondage of sin, captivity to Satan, and liberty by Christ; tell of wrong done to their precious souls, and the hazard of their eternal welfare, then you bring strange things to their ears. Jesus plainly reminded them, that the man who practised any sin, was, in fact, a slave to that sin, which was the case with most of them. Christ in the gospel offers us freedom, he has power to do this, and those whom Christ makes free are really so.” Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

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black-gangs

The violent are slaves to violence. Abusers are slaves to abuse. True freedom begins with humility. A humble man is not a weak man. Jesus Christ was not a weak man A weak man will beat a woman, but cower down to another man. Weak men have no honor. Only the humble man is truly a strong man, especially one in Christ Jesus.

“And Jesus came and spake unto them, saying, All power is given unto me in heaven and in earth.”

Matthew 28:18

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“The fear of the LORD is the instruction for wisdom, And before honor comes humility.”

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Man seeks honor from his deeds whether good or evil. Our society celebrates those who live ungodly lives, and commit all manner of sin. How in the world George Zimmerman achieved celebrity status is beyond me. This person has not one ounce of humility even after taking the life of another. I guess he feels more like a man after being arrested for crimes against others and recklessness. “ Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.”

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Some people, especially the rich and famous give to charities and sometimes help individuals. That is a good thing. Sadly, they often desire the praise of the world, instead of humbly doing good deeds in silence.

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“Beware of practicing your righteousness before men to be noticed by them; otherwise you have no reward with your Father who is in heaven.” Matthew 6:1

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The lack of humility and dishonor of her God is the ruin of a nation.

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“Although a wicked person who commits a hundred crimes may live a long time, I know that it will go better with those who fear God, who are reverent before him.” Ecclesiastes 8:12

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For evildoers will be cut off,
But those who wait for the L
ORD, they will inherit the land.

10Yet a little while and the wicked man will be no more;
And you will look carefully for his place and he will not be there.

11But the humble will inherit the land
And will delight themselves in abundant prosperity.

Psalm 37:9-11

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la-me-1113-spiderman-fun 162180.ME.1112.spiderman-funeralToo often, this is how the quest for power ends.

“For My hand made all these things, Thus all these things came into being,” declares the LORD. “But to this one I will look, To him who is humble and contrite of spirit, and who trembles at My word.” Isaiah 66:2

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1 Peter 5:5

“You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders; and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for GOD IS OPPOSED TO THE PROUD, BUT GIVES GRACE TO THE HUMBLE.”

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 1http://www.worldbank.org/en/news/opinion/2013/11/25/missing-men-violence-against-women

2 http://www.worldbank.org/en/news/opinion/2013/11/25/missing-men-violence-against-women

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Become a Better Man: Humility is a Strength and Trait of A Real Man

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Humility: The Quiet Trait That Everyone Will Notice

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The Truest Expression of a Man. What Validates You?

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How To Be A Man – 8 Traits Of Real Men

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Honor God, Honor Others and Honor Yourself

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What is Manliness?

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DALLAS MEN AGAINST ABUSE

What It Takes to Be A Man

A man never hits a woman.
A man speaks out against domestic abuse.
A man teaches his daughter how men should treat her and that she should never allow herself to be abused. Not once.
A man teaches his sons to respect women.

TESTIMONIALS

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Respect for women

http://www.spiritual-side-of-domestic-violence.org

No portion of this web site may be copied, edited, or used in any form without prior permission.

© Spiritual Side of Domestic Violence Org., 2014
All rights reserved.

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Posted by on February 7, 2014 in Uncategorized

 

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DO ABUSERS HAVE A CONSCIENCE?

By Terry Loving

The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. Timothy 1:5

A CRY FOR JUSTICE BOOK

“And herein do I exercise myself – And this very tenet is a pledge for my good behavior; for as I believe there will be a resurrection, both of the just and unjust, and that every man shall be judged for the deeds done in the body, so I exercise myself day and night, that I may have a conscience void of offense toward God and toward men.

Toward God – In entertaining no opinion contrary to his truth; and in offering no worship contrary to his dignity, purity, and excellence.

Toward men – In doing nothing to them that I would not, on a change of circumstances, they should do to me; and in withholding nothing by which I might comfort and serve them.” 1

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“Abusive people have dysfunctional or even non-functioning consciences. In contrast, their victims have very active consciences. And the abuser uses this to his advantage. He can, without any hesitation or remorse, insinuate a horrid charge against her, making her feel the pangs of her own conscience, and causing her to wonder if she really is guilty.” 2

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Most have heard the saying, “Let your conscience be your guide.” When making decisions in life, “normal” thinking people rely on their inner voice to decide what actions they should take. Depending upon the level of maturity, a person with high morals, integrity, ethics and the like will usually make decisions they can live with. In other words, the choices they make in life would be those that do not keep them awake at night torturing their minds with guilt. After making their final decision they are able to live with themselves knowing they made the right choice – no harm done.

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1 John 3:21
“Beloved, if our heart condemn us not, then have we confidence toward God.”

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The abuser’s decision-making process is much different. Their decisions are not based upon what is right, just, fair, moral, ethical, nor do they consider the feelings of others. Life is all about the abuser and their comfort and well-being. It is within the avenues of power and control as well as entitlement that the abuser establishes a domain of terror. He feels justified.

depression1

The word conscience is defined as:

[kon-shuhns] Show IPA

noun

1. the inner sense of what is right or wrong in one’s conduct or motives, impelling one toward right action: to follow the dictates of conscience.

2. the complex of ethical and moral principles that controls or inhibits the actions or thoughts of an individual.

3. an inhibiting sense of what is prudent: I’d eat another piece of pie but my conscience would bother me. 3

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Pastor Jeff Crippen beautifully explains in his book – A CRY FOR JUSTICE how we assume that abusers must be “weighed down” by their horrid actions toward others. Normally, non-abusive souls would agonize over wrongs committed towards others, and seek to make amends. Because we would feel bad inside, we naturally think that others would feel the same – not so with abusers. In fact, Jeff explains how abusers use our assumptions against us as they play the “victim.” The abuser’s deeds do not weigh heavy upon them, for they are functioning in what they perceive as a normal way of life. They are oblivious to the real pain they cause others because they do not care – life is all about the abuser – no one else – not even God.

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abused woman

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In the absence of a “healthy” conscience, abusers can beat the daylights out of their victims, and minutes later take the family out for an ice cream cone. His family, especially his spouse is his personal property to do with them as he sees fit. The beatings or verbal put downs in his mind are his God-given right to keep his family in line. After all, God made him the head, and all beneath him must submit or face dire consequences. Is there any remorse for the abuse? Never! Entitlement and false justification do not produce such emotions.

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Abusers lack empathy which is why they can bloody your face and throw you a towel in disgust – “Clean yourself up, you are a mess!” Your bloody wounds are only an issue when you no longer look “pretty.” After all, he is the only man that is allowed to look at you. They will never admit fault for your pain, because you – according to them – “Brought it on yourself!” Abusers are very capable of fake empathy, especially when the abused threatens to leave them. The false tears only serve to melt the heart of the abused, and the cycle of torture will repeat itself. This is how the crazy making stage begins.

obey fist

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Abusers who claim to be Christians pretend holiness, and yet – they have no conscience – not in the sense of what we define as “normal.” 1Timothy 4:2 speaks of “hypocrites” and “liars” that have a conscience that has been “seared with a hot iron.” Verses 1-5 gives us a clear picture of the spiritual apostasy that shall take place in these “latter days” – the Christian age. According to various views of Bible commentaries, a conscience “seared with a hot iron” can also be applied to the conscience of abusers, especially those who call themselves Christians.

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Can we not safely say that abusers in our places of worship have “departed from the faith?” The foundation of the “faith” that Jesus ministered is based on love. It is not possible that abusers are following Christ, but their own hypocritical self-imposed doctrine of hate. They are incapable of the agape love that we should have for one another. Agape love possesses compassion for the plight of others as well as; empathy; true love; it is selfless, sacrificial, unconditional love that abusers do not possess.

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“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” John 3:16

“He that loves not knows not God; for God is love.” 1 John 4:8

“A new commandment I give to you, That you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another.”  John 13:34-35

“Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.”  1 Corinthians 13:1-13

The consciences of abusers are senseless and unfeeling as flesh that has been cauterized. “The sensitiveness of their consciences is destroyed by the brand of the devil.”  People’s New Testament

domestic-abuse

“The metaphor is from the practice of branding slaves or criminals, the latter on the brow. These deceivers are not acting under delusion, but deliberately, and against their conscience. They wear the form of godliness, and contradict their profession by their crooked conduct (2 Timothy 3:5). The brand is not on their brow, but on their conscience. Comp.” Titus 1:15; Titus 3:11Vincent’s Word Studies

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“To the pure, all things are pure; but to those who are defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure, but both their mind and their conscience are defiled.” (Titus 1:15)

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Jeff also notes a “degree of abuse” that ranges from “remarkably selfish” to “narcissistic,” “sociopaths” to “psychopaths.” When abusers reach the sociopath or psychopath levels, many people view the abusers as having no conscience at all. However, Pastor Crippen maintains that abusers do have a conscience, but they are “dysfunctional.” They possess not the normal means of inner conviction which keeps our passions for wrong in check.

When the searing of the conscience takes place, no one can say for sure. What we can know is the fact that abusers “speak lies in hypocrisy,” they are senseless, and unfeeling:

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 “Such a conscience exists in a mind that will practice delusion without concern; that will carry on a vast system of fraud without wincing; that will incarcerate, scourge, or burn the innocent without compassion; and that will practice gross enormities, and indulge in sensual gratifications under the mask of piety.”  Barnes’ Notes on the Bible

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The Sociopath Next Door

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I highly recommend A CRY FOR JUSTICE for many reasons. It opened my eyes to a darker side of abusers, and their cunning ways. This book took my understanding of abuse much deeper, and I could feel the essence of evil more acutely as I read each page. It is a must read for those who desire to counsel the abused, and for church leaders who need to educate themselves concerning this atrocity that is hidden within our houses of worship. In addition, I also recommend this book for self-study as well as group Bible study.

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The main reason I applaud this work is the fact that Pastor Crippen isn’t afraid to “call a spade a spade.” He says what needs to be said, and isn’t concerned as many other pastors are about stepping on toes. There is no arrogance in his preaching  and teaching against domestic abuse, for he understands that the Christian church is under spiritual attack, and the people of God have been silent and ignorant for too long. The last place on earth we should witness abuse is in our houses of worship, and our Christian homes.

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It is important to understand the many faces of abusers and how they deceive us. Jeff also covers topics such as, “Why the Church Covers Up Abuse,” “Dealing With Abusers,” “The Abuser’s Use of Shame and Fear” and much more. He also covers “The Devastating Effects of Abuse on Children.” Personally, I am one who is suffering, and will most likely continue to suffer those “devastating effects.” They are very real!

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Pastor Crippen and Anna Wood – THANK YOU!

http://cryingoutforjustice.wordpress.com/

A Cry for Justice: How the Evil of Domestic Abuse Hides in Your Church

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Conscience (36 Occurrences)

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http://www.sociopathworld.com/

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Profile of the Sociopath

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Charmer/ Abusers and their ‘Prey’

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   An Interview with Martha Stout

How do you spot a sociopath?

“A sociopath has no conscience, no ability to feel shame, guilt or remorse. Since 1 in 25 ordinary Americans is a sociopath, you almost certainly know one or more than one already. How can you recognize him or her?”

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Potentially Abusive Personalities: Some Red Flags – by Dr. George Simon, Jr.

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 1 Clarke’s Commentary on the Bible

2 A CRY FOR JUSTICE – The Abuser’s Use of Shame and Fear – 89

 3 Chicago Manual Style (CMS):conscience. Dictionary.com. Dictionary.com Unabridged. Random House, Inc. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/conscience (accessed: April 14, 2013).

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http://www.spiritual-side-of-domestic-violence.org

No portion of this web site may be copied, edited, or used in any form without prior permission.

© Spiritual Side of Domestic Violence Org., 2009-2013
All rights reserved.

 
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Posted by on April 14, 2013 in Sociopaths And Psycopaths

 

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WHY IS “REPENT” SUCH A DIRTY WORD?

By Terry Loving

Mourners bench2

“Thus says the LORD, “Stand by the ways and see and ask for the ancient paths, Where the good way is, and walk in it; And you will find rest for your souls. But they said, ‘We will not walk in it.’”

Jeremiah 6:16

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In times past, preachers and Revivalists used what was called the “mourner’s bench” to call sinners to repentance.  After hearing a sermon that cut deep within the soul, a “sinner” would be “moved” by the Holy Spirit to change their sinful ways, kneel at the mourner’s bench – confess and denounce all wrong.

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In modern churches, preachers invite or extend altar calls to those who desire to receive Jesus Christ as their personal Savior. During this time, people will publically confess Jesus as Lord, and get baptized – depending on the type of church they worship in.  This is also a time of “joining” a place of worship that is to your liking.

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The mourner’s bench has no spiritual powers – its significance is merely a symbol, a visual that connected sin, confession and repentance.  The practice was akin to kneeling at the foot of the cross and seeking with a contrite heart a cleansing of the soul. In some places of worship, public confession is practiced, and people are invited to empty their souls before the whole congregation. But times have changed, and the practice of confession of sins to God before an audience has all but disappeared.  Granted, we can go directly to God and confess our sins in private, however, this post mainly concerns the duty of repentance overall.

Mourners two

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John the Baptist Prepares the Way

1In those days John the Baptist came, preaching in the Desert of Judea 2and saying, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near.” 3This is he who was spoken of through the prophet Isaiah:

“A voice of one calling in the desert, ‘Prepare the way for the Lord, make straight paths for him.’”a

“In the time of John, the nation had become extremely wicked and corrupt, perhaps more so than at any preceding period. Hence, both he and Christ began their ministry by calling the nation to repentance.”    Barnes’ Notes on the Bible

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Matthew 4:17  “From that time on Jesus began to preach, “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near.”

Both John and our Lord began their ministries calling for sinners to “repent.” So how is it that ministers today omit this requirement for salvation? Jesus said, “…It is not those who are healthy who need a physician, but those who are sick; I did not come to call the righteous but sinners.”

Luke 5:32 says that sinners are called to repentance.

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mourners three

“I came not to call the righteous,…. Such as the Scribes and Pharisees were in their own apprehension, and in the esteem of others, who trusted in themselves, that they were righteous, and submitted not to the righteousness of Christ: these Christ came not to call by his grace, and therefore did not associate himself with them: but sinners to repentance; such as the publicans, and others, with them, were; and therefore he was chiefly with such, and chose to be among them: these he not only called to repentance by the outward ministry of the word, but brought them to it; he having power to bestow the grace of repentance, as well as to call to the duty of it;” Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible

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“5:27-39 It was a wonder of Christ’s grace, that he would call a publican to be his disciple and follower. It was a wonder of his grace, that the call was made so effectual. It was a wonder of his grace, that he came to call sinners to repentance, and to assure them of pardon. It was a wonder of his grace, that he so patiently bore the contradiction of sinners against himself and his disciples. It was a wonder of his grace, that he fixed the services of his disciples according to their strength and standing. The Lord trains up his people gradually for the trials allotted them; we should copy his example in dealing with the weak in faith, or the tempted believer.” Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

Jesus_Said_Repent

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Every person on the face of this earth could benefit from a mourner’s bench of the heart. At any time, we can call upon God to forgive our sins – but we must first acknowledge that we are sinners who have a desire to change our ways, and therefore we must repent. But how can we know that we sin against God and others, even ourselves if the preaching is watered down, preached timidly, and filled with promises of riches in this life? If preaching hellfire and brimstone, and repentance of sins is so unpopular – then how can sinners be convicted of their sins so they can come to Christ and be saved?

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mourners one

Although repentance is for everyone, the remainder of this post will address domestic abusers, especially those who call themselves “Christians.”

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Prayer of a Suffering Penitent

Kind David lamented in Psalm 38 that suffering, and un-confessed sin was the cause of his “anxiety.”

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“For I confess my iniquity; I am full of anxiety because of my sin.”

“For I will declare mine iniquity – That is, he was not disposed to hide his sin. He would make no concealment of the fact that he regarded himself as a sinner. He admitted this to be true, and he admitted that his sin was the cause of all his troubles. It was the fact that he was a sinner that so painfully affected his mind; and he was not disposed to attempt to conceal it from anyone.”  Barnes’ Notes on the Bible

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“I will be sorry for my sin – I will not deny it; I will not apologize for it. I admit the truth of what my conscience charges on me; I admit the correctness and the propriety of the divine judgment by which I have been afflicted on account of my sin; I desire to repent of all my transgressions, and to turn from them.”

“For I will declare mine iniquity,…. Either to men, to ease his mind, justify God in his proceedings with him, and for their caution and admonition: or rather to God, against whom he had sinned, and who only could pardon him; with a view to which he was determined to make a free and open confession of it before him:”  Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible

mourner four

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“David’s troubles were the chastisement and the consequence of his transgressions, whilst Christ suffered for our sins and ours only. What right can a sinner have to yield to impatience or anger, when mercifully corrected for his sins? David was very sensible of the present workings of corruption in him.” Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

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1 Corinthians 11:32 “When we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world.”

David’s penitent prayer did not include a “mourner’s bench” – but his soul mourned over his sins. Deep inside, his soul acknowledged he was a sinner, had sinned, confessed it, and repented.

2 Corinthians 7:10  “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.”

David’s heart was contrite and his prayer of repentance was honored by God.

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.”

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“The good work wrought in every true penitent, is a broken spirit, a broken and a contrite heart, and sorrow for sin. It is a heart that is tender, and pliable to God’s word. Oh that there were such a heart in every one of us! God is graciously pleased to accept this; it is instead of all burnt-offering and sacrifice. The broken heart is acceptable to God only through Jesus Christ; there is no true repentance without faith in him. Men despise that which is broken, but God will not.”   Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

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You cannot be a Christian and an abuser as well.The words “Christian” and “abuser” are not synonymous. They do not belong together, and there is no such thing. There are “Christians” and there are those who abuse while claiming to serve Jesus Christ. If you are an abuser, you are not a true Christian.

Domestic violence and abuse amount to sin, and un-confessed sin separates us from God’s grace and hinders prayers:

Psalm 34:15 The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their cry;

Psalm 66:18 If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened;

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“We know that God does not hear sinners; but if anyone is God-fearing and does His will, He hears him.”

Proverbs 15:29 The LORD is far from the wicked but he hears the prayer of the righteous.

Isaiah 1:15 – “When you spread out your hands in prayer, I will hide my eyes from you; even if you offer many prayers, I will not listen. Your hands are full of blood;”

the clay

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Those of you who are married:

“In the same way, you husbands must give honor to your wives. Treat your wife with understanding as you live together. She may be weaker than you are, but she is your equal partner in God’s gift of new life. Treat her as you should so your prayers will not be hindered.” 1 Peter 3:7

Christians are not exempt from wrong-doing and committing evil even as the world does. Unfortunately, Christians have a tendency to see the world as “us” and “them,” “saints” and “sinner,” – however, believers can fall as well. We judge the sins of non-believers as if we never sinned ourselves:

“Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.” 1 Corinthians 6:11

womanPraying

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“You therefore, beloved, knowing this beforehand, be on your guard so that you are not carried away by the error of unprincipled men and fall from your own steadfastness,” New American Standard Bible (©1995)

1 Corinthians 10:12 “So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall!”

2 Peter 1:10 “Therefore, my brothers, be all the more eager to make your calling and election sure. For if you do these things, you will never fall…”

Abusers in the body of Christ do not love God, and they are not of God.  In fact, their whole idea of “love” is distorted and worldly. Love should not abuse. Love should not hurt.

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Preaching repentance from the pulpit may not be popular or draw crowds, but there is no other way to forgiveness. One may confess to accept Jesus Christ, but without true repentance and a heart change, the confession is mere words – worthless.

Abusers in the body of Christ are yet “carnal” and have “a form of godliness.”

Having a form of godliness – will apply well to those who have all their religion in their creed, confession of faith, catechism, bodies of divinity, etc., while destitute of the life of God in their souls; and are not only destitute of this life, but deny that such life or power is here to be experienced or known. They have religion in their creed, but none in their hearts. Clarke’s Commentary on the Bible

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Fear of God pic

“When men do not fear God, they will not regard man. When children are disobedient to their parents, that makes the times perilous. Men are unholy and without the fear of God, because unthankful for the mercies of God. We abuse God’s gifts, if we make them the food and fuel of our lusts. Times are perilous also, when parents are without natural affection to children. And when men have no rule over their own spirits, but despise that which is good and to be honoured. God is to be loved above all; but a carnal mind, full of enmity against him, prefers any thing before him, especially carnal pleasure.” Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

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But denying the power thereof – Opposing the real power of religion; not allowing it to exert any influence in their lives. It imposes no restraint on their passions and carnal propensities, but in all respects, except in the form of religion, they live as if they had None. This has been common in the world. From such turn away – Have no contact with them as if they were Christians; show no countenance to their religion; do not associate with them; compare 2 John 1:10-11; see the notes at 2 Corinthians 6:17.   Barnes’ Notes on the Bible

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New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“THERE IS NO FEAR OF GOD BEFORE THEIR EYES.”

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Family-Praying1

“There is no fear of God – Psalm 36:1. The word “fear” here denotes “reverence, awe, veneration.” There is no such regard or reverence for the character, authority, and honor of God as to restrain them from crime. Their conduct shows that they are not withheld from the commission of iniquity by any regard to the fear or favor of God. The only thing that will be effectual in restraining people from sin, will be a regard to the honor and Law of God.” Barnes’ Notes on the Bible

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Many people ask, “When will domestic violence end?” The only way this evil will end is those who abuse must first hear the pure undiluted Word of God. The power is not in the preaching per se, but in the Word itself:

“For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart.” Hebrews 4:12

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“The idea here is, that what “God had said” is suited to detect hypocrisy and to lay open the true nature of the feelings of the soul, so that there can be no escape for the guilty. His “truth” is adapted to bring out the real feelings, and to show man exactly what he is. Truth always has this power – whether preached, or read, or communicated by conversation, or impressed upon the memory and conscience by the Holy Spirit. There can be no escape from the penetrating, searching application of the Word of God. That truth has power to show what man is, and is like a penetrating sword that lays open the whole man; compare Isaiah 49:2. The phrase “the Word of God” here may be applied, therefore, to the “truth” of God, however made known to the mind. In some way it will bring out the real feelings, and show what man is.” Barnes’ Notes on the Bible

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repent7

“When I say to a wicked man, ‘You will surely die,’ and you do not warn him or speak out to dissuade him from his evil ways in order to save his life, that wicked man will die for his sin, and I will hold you accountable for his blood.” Ezekiel 3:18

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“Repent” is not a dirty word – it holds the key to spiritual regeneration, and leads the lost and erring to the One who saves. It opens the door of stony hearts to receive guidance from God’s loving kindness and long suffering for our sakes. Feel good sermons won’t change hearts, nor will prosperity preaching – teaching disciples to place their trust in riches. Repentance cleanses the soul and gives us another chance to be in right standing with God.

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If you are an abuser who claims to know God, you are lying to yourself. You who are in the pulpit and abusing your loved ones are worst off, and you will be subject to a higher scrutiny in the Judgment. There should be no shame in confessing your faults to save your souls. If not, why bother getting up on Sunday morning and walking through the church house doors? What is the point? God is not listening to you.

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Except-Ye-Repent

Lastly, King David acknowledged that his sins and his sins alone were the cause of his misery. Abusers blame their loved ones when things go wrong in their lives, but David says:

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“For I confess my iniquity; I am full of anxiety because of my sin.”

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Abusers possess an uneasy spirit – a fretfulness that does not allow them to be at peace with themselves. In public, they put on a front that all is well until they reach home. When those who could witness their false sense of self are not present, they unleash their unjust fury upon those who they claim to love.

Abusers why not put pride aside and do as David did before it is too late? Domestic violence and abuse is wrong, sinful, and you alone are to blame for the turmoil within your household. You may lead the beautiful songs on Sunday morning, preach earth shaking sermons, and serve within your congregation seven days a week – but your un-repentant sins will soon find you out.

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“For nothing is hidden, except to be revealed; nor has anything been secret, but that it would come to light.”  Mark 4:22

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“Depart from evil and do good; Seek peace and pursue it.”

3 John 1:11 “Dear friend, do not imitate what is evil but what is good. Anyone who does what is good is from God. Anyone who does what is evil has not seen God.”

Proverbs 14:16 “A wise man fears the LORD and shuns evil, but a fool is hotheaded and reckless.”

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; DEPART FROM ME, YOU WHO PRACTICE LAWLESSNESS.'”

King James 2000 Bible (©2003)
“And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, you that work iniquity.”

What is “lawlessness” and “iniquity?” – SIN!

What is domestic violence? – SIN!

What is abuse? – SIN!

Set the captives free

REPENT!

 “Blessed is the man who always fears the LORD, but he who hardens his heart falls into trouble.” Proverbs 28:14

“Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it.” Matthew 7:13

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How to Recognize True (and false) Contrition — by Dr. George Simon, Jr.

“A person’s character deficiencies inevitably spawn a host of irresponsible behavior patterns – bad habits that can become easily ingrained and, once rooted, extremely hard to break.  Often, these dysfunctional patterns involve forms of mental, emotional, and even physical abuse within relationships.  And while many of the character-impaired individuals I’ve worked with experienced periods of profound unhappiness and even a degree of regret over their actions, only a handful made truly significant changes in their once destructive behaviors.”

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“Kevin says faith has also helped him, but it’s only one piece of the puzzle. “What oftentimes happens is that people will think because they’re at a church or a synagogue or a mosque or whatever their particular faith is that they’re okay. No. Are you really dealing with where this emotional hurt came from?” he says. “Mental development has to happen, emotional development.”

“Kevin says healing doesn’t only happen when talking to a therapist or pastor. It also happens through support groups or advocacy organizations. “Part of this is that we have got to make a commitment to becoming allies in speaking out against this,” he says. “Are you willing for the rest of your life to commit verbally, emotionally, spiritually to challenging any forms of violence toward women and girls?” he says. “That’s the kind of work we need to get to.”

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Why Men Abuse Women

“Tony says it felt like he “blacked out” during the abuse. “You don’t understand what’s going on,” he says. “I completely own up to [what I did], but in that rage, it’s like your brain wires, they aren’t clicking.”

“He says being in an abusive relationship is like being in a drug addiction. “It becomes like your bond in the sense that the woman is like cocaine inside of that relationship. That’s the only connection you have, because there’s no real love,” he says. “In order to overcome it, it’s almost like you have to separate, go to rehab, move out of the dope house and never come back.”

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Domestic Violence and Claims of Change: Is It Possible?

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Danger of Rationalizing Sin

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How to tell if he’s changing

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How to tell if he’s not changing

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DOMESTIC ABUSE – DOES IT EVER STOP?

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http://www.spiritual-side-of-domestic-violence.org

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“THE DEVIL MADE ME DO IT!”

By Terry Loving


John 6:70 “Then Jesus replied, “Have I not chosen you, the Twelve? Yet one of you is a devil!”

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Geraldine Jones” – a fictional character of the late comedian Flip Wilson popularized the expression, “The devil made me do it.” Each time she made bad choices in life, she found a way to escape responsibility by shifting the blame for her actions.  “Geraldine,” was instrumental in the success of the Flip Wilson show in the early 1970’s. Flip was funny – “Geraldine” was funny – the devil was the cause of all of her ills, and we laughed.

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When “Bishop” Thomas Weeks III blamed the devil for his beating his ex-wife “Prophetess” Juanita Bynum in the parking lot of an Atlanta hotel, no one laughed, and it certainly was not funny.  God gave humans free will, but the devil gets the blame for how free will is exercised. Mr. Weeks chose to express his free will in the form of rage, dismissing the fact that he had complete control over his actions – regardless of what prompted the argument. There was no little red devil sitting on his shoulder telling him to batter his wife, and publicly humiliate her.  Thomas Weeks III made a choice – the choice to batter.

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There are many batterers who will blame the violence on the abused – “See, look what you made me do!” “If you would just do what I say, I wouldn’t have to hit you.” “Submit! Submit and do what I say, then I won’t have to go off.” “You made me this way!” “God said you have to obey me, and you didn’t – so I hit you!” “God made me the head, and you have to obey me!” And the lists of excuses to batter are endless.

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Many preachers do not preach about the devil for, they claim this gives him too much credit – too much press. More emphasis is placed on the victory over evil in Christ and rightly so. However, the Bible, even Jesus Himself made known that we have a very real adversary. If it wasn’t important that we should know of Satan and how he operates, I believe God would have omitted this information from His Word.  Not only does this evil menace hate mankind, he has sought our spiritual demise from the beginning – his lies and deception began in the Garden of Eden:

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Paradise was conditionalThen the LORD God took the man and put him into the Garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it. The LORD God commanded the man, saying, “From any tree of the garden you may eat freely; but from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat from it you will surely die.”

“Now the serpent was more crafty than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said to the woman, “Indeed, has God said, ‘You shall not eat from any tree of the garden’?” The woman said to the serpent, “From the fruit of the trees of the garden we may eat; but from the fruit of the tree which is in the middle of the garden, God has said, ‘You shall not eat from it or touch it, or you will die.’” The serpent said to the woman, “You surely will not die! “For God knows that in the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loin coverings.” 1

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Hence the blame game, also known as “Passing the buck.” When confronted with what God already knew, Adam tried to shift the blame from himself to not only the woman, but God Himself – “The man said, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me from the tree, and I ate.”

“His wickedness and lack of true repentance appears in this that he blamed God because he had given him a wife.” Geneva Study Bible

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Next, the woman had to give an account for disobedience. “Then the LORD God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?” And the woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”

“That is, a spirit in the serpent, which she took for a good one, but proved a bad one, with lying words and deceitful language imposed upon her, told her that the fruit forbidden was very good food, and very useful to improve knowledge; even to such a degree as to make men like God; and this God knew, and therefore out of envy and ill will to them forbid the eating of it; nor need they fear his menaces, for they might depend upon it they should never die; and thus he caused her to err from the truth, and to believe a lie; and by giving heed to the seducing spirit she was prevailed upon to eat of the fruit of the tree, which was forbidden, and which she owns; and it is an ingenuous confession that she makes as to the matter of fact; but yet, like her husband, and as learning it from him, she endeavours to shift off the blame from herself, and lay it on the serpent.”

Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible

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The devil can deceive mankind, but he cannot force anyone to do anything.  His chief entryway into our souls is through thoughts, ideas, and suggestions. He studies our actions and habits, especially those that would cause us to lose our souls. The devil’s greatest tool is deception, a very powerful spiritual weapon – that traps Christians and non-Christians alike.

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Deception plays a major part in domestic abuse – most abusers are deceived in thinking they do not have a problem with anger and violence. Satan convinces the mind of the abuser that it is the woman’s fault that he behaves so badly. In fact, deception causes the abuser to not see his actions as harmful, but right in his own eyes. This is especially true when it comes to abusers in the church – “God made me the head!” Unfortunately, being the “head” is not viewed correctly from a Biblical standpoint, but from the view of an earthly tyrant.

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1 Peter 5:8 warns us to – “ be watchful,” self-controlled and alert,” “watch out for your great enemy the devil,” “ be sober-minded;” “ be watchful,” “ be of sober spirit,” “ be on the alert,” “be vigilant,” “be reflective,”  “keep your mind clear and “self-controlled” – WHY? – “Because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walks about, seeking whom he may devour.”

“As a roaring lion – Compare Revelation 12:12. Sometimes Satan is represented as transforming himself into an angel of light, (see the notes at 2 Corinthians 11:14); and sometimes, as here, as a roaring lion: denoting the efforts which he makes to alarm and overpower us. The lion here is not the crouching lion – the lion stealthfully creeping toward his foe – but it is the raging monarch of the woods, who by his terrible roar would intimidate all so that they might become an easy prey. The particular thing referred to here, doubtless, is persecution, resembling in its terrors a roaring lion. When error comes in; when seductive arts abound; when the world allures and charms the representation of the character of the foe is not of the roaring lion, but of the silent influence of an enemy that has clothed himself in the garb of an angel of light,” 2 Corinthians 11:14.    Barnes’ Notes on the Bible

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Satan “influenced” Thomas Weeks III to strike his wife, but he did so through what was already in his heart – anger.  Satan cannot read our minds; however, he has observed the behavior of humans since the beginning of time. He uses what we say, and watches what we do. He uses our propensity to certain negative activities, and works his evil influence. He cannot make anyone do anything, keep this truth in mind.

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“Geraldine” claimed the devil made her buy a dress. Truth is Satan swayed her decision. The devil was able to mentally and emotionally influence “Geraldine’s” will power through her vanity, “The devil told me how good I look.” Just as he convinced Eve that the forbidden fruit would make her wise (vanity), he convinced “Geraldine” that she had to have that dress, for it had her favorite – “flowers,” and there was “no harm in trying on the dress.” The devil made sure he pointed out other facts that were enticing, “It’s on sale, and your size too.” “Why don’t you treat yourself to that dress?”

Like any temptation once you get too close, you most likely will follow through. Too often the devil will try to convince us that doing or possessing something is “no harm” in the doing or possessing. When in fact, the designs are meant to kill and destroy – alcoholism, smoking cigarettes, pot, adultery, fornication etc.

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 But why was the devil interested in her buying a dress? For one, this caused discord with her husband, “What! Another dress?” She purchased several dresses in one week possibly reducing the household savings, and going over personal agreed upon allowances. Money issues tear apart many homes due to vanity, materialism and bad habits. The lack of money causes many abused women to remain in violent homes, as the abusers control the household finances.

Proverbs 4:3 advises, “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” The “heart” in this case is our emotions, mind, soul, nature, core, sentiment, and our temperament.

kardia: heart – Greek meaning :

“2588 kardíaheart; “the affective center of our being” and the capacity of moral preference (volitional desire, choice; see P. Hughs, 2 Cor, 354); “desire-producer that makes us tick” (G. Archer), i.e our “desire-decisions” that establish who we really are.

[Heart (2588 /kardía) is mentioned over 800 times in Scripture, but never referring to the literal physical pump that drives the blood. That is, “heart” is only used figuratively (both in the OT and NT.]”

“Keep thy heart with all diligence,…. The mind from vanity, the understanding from error, the will from perverseness, the conscience clear of guilt, the affections from being inordinate and set on evil objects, the thoughts from being employed on bad subjects; and the whole from falling into the hands of the enemy, or being the possession of Satan:”  Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible

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Ryan Brunn opened the door to the devil by watching child pornography. The news accounts do not give a timeline between watching that filth and the rape and murder of Jorelys Rivera, however, the devil capitalized on the evil Ryan enjoyed, and the thoughts, ideas and suggestions of hell led to a 7-year old being raped, tortured and murdered. After Ryan used his free will to oblige the devil, he threw the little girl in a trash dumpster, discarded her like rubbish.

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2 Corinthians 2:11 says in different versions that Satan “outwits,” “outsmarts,” “takes advantage of,” “over-reaches” mankind. We are not referring to a “little man in a red suit,” or a red devil with a pitch fork that sits on your shoulder and whispers in your ear. Satan is very intelligent, and he knows how the heart of man operates, for he was once an angel in heaven before his pride and rebellion caused his expulsion.

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New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“And the great dragon was thrown down, the serpent of old who is called the devil and Satan, who deceives the whole world; he was thrown down to the earth, and his angels were thrown down with him.”

Satan’s greatest weapon is deception. He has convinced the world with the exception of a few that he does not exist. And those who somewhat believe in evil attributes it to that little red devil with the pitchfork. If this were so, could we just grab that little nuisance, squash him and be done with evil? We could only dream such a victory. “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.”   New American Standard Bible (©1995)

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Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

“The whole design of Satan is to devour and destroy souls. He always is contriving whom he may insnare to eternal ruin. Our duty plainly is, to be sober; to govern both the outward and the inward man by the rules of temperance. To be vigilant; suspicious of constant danger from this spiritual enemy, watchful and diligent to prevent his designs. Be stedfast, or solid, by faith. A man cannot fight upon a quagmire, there is no standing without firm ground to tread upon; this faith alone furnishes. It lifts the soul to the firm advanced ground of the promises, and fixes it there. The consideration of what others suffer, is proper to encourage us to bear our share in any affliction; and in whatever form Satan assaults us, or by whatever means, we may know that our brethren experience the same.” Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

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Countless sources document that abusers live what they learn. When abusers witness their mothers getting abused as children, they often become abusers themselves in their relationships. I believe this is true from what I have witnessed by way of personal experiences. However, the more I research domestic violence, the more I am convinced that evil influences the abuse more than we acknowledge, or understand. The violence in our world is increasing with hellish venom. Personally, I do not believe that everyone who commits violence in our world was abused as a child themselves.

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Violence is a learned behavior, which often times is influenced by the enemy of God and His creation. Just because you do not believe in satanic influence, that does not mean it doesn’t exist. Many people do not believe in the existence of a Divine Creator – does that make His existence invalid? – Not at all. The disobedience of Adam and Eve brought evil into our world, and the first murder was committed by one of their sons, Cain. The closest analogy to what happened in the Garden of Eden is the myth of Pandora’s Box. Once evil was released, it could not be taken back, and it grew and continues to grow worst.

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The serpent of the Garden and Satan are one in the same. Before the devil was cursed to crawl on his belly forever, he was an angel in heaven. He was not satisfied being an angel subject to his Creator – Satan desired to be God himself. His pride and evil desires caused a war in heaven that he lost, and was cast down to earth along with his angels.

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Trying to understand what makes people violent and abusive is a difficult task. There are many abusers who are brainwashed by sexism, and others who believe in order to be a “real” man, you have to be aggressive and tough – especially with your mate and offspring. However, God’s Word will help us to understand the spiritual influence behind the scenes so to speak. Humans are guided by either good or evil. The knowledge of both entered the world through sin, but we have a choice as to which will govern our lives.

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So how can the abused combat the evil that is happening to them? First, know your enemy – in flesh as well as spirit. Spiritual warfare is very real, and the effects are evident in our world today. Many blame God for the evil that we suffer in our lives, but He is not to blame. Our first parents were given free will – choice – something Americans especially are very proud of possessing in our country. All of humanity was granted the same opportunity to either do good or do evil – help or harm – lift up or tear down. Most choose to destroy, and the devil is much pleased to assist.

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We must use our spiritual weapons to combat domestic violence and abuse.

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.”

Before soldiers go to war, they map of a plan of action. They study the enemy, habits, location, strength, etc. Christians are called to be soldiers in the army of God. But the sad thing is, too many believers have been deceived by Satan to the extent of staking a claim of comfort in this world. We are on a journey, and as we travel through this dark world, we need the light of the Gospel:

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“Your word is a lamp to my feet And a light to my path.”

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The Armor of God

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Stand firm therefore, HAVING GIRDED YOUR LOINS WITH TRUTH, and HAVING PUT ON THE BREASTPLATE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS, and having shod YOUR FEET WITH THE PREPARATION OF THE GOSPEL OF PEACE; in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take THE HELMET OF SALVATION, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”

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 THE DEMONIC

14And when they were come to the multitude, there came to him a man, kneeling to him, saying, 15Lord, have mercy on my son: for he is epileptic, and suffereth grievously; for oft-times he falleth into the fire, and off-times into the water. 16And I brought him to thy disciples, and they could not cure him. 17And Jesus answered and said, O faithless and perverse generation, how long shall I be with you? how long shall I bear with you? bring him hither to me. 18And Jesus rebuked him; and the demon went out of him: and the boy was cured from that hour.

19Then came the disciples to Jesus apart, and said, Why could not we cast it out? 20And he saith unto them, Because of your little faith: for verily I say unto you, If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you. 21But this kind goeth not out save by prayer and fasting.”

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Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary

“9:14-29 The father of the suffering youth reflected on the want of power in the disciples; but Christ will have him reckon the disappointment to the want of faith. Very much is promised to our believing. If thou canst believe, it is possible that thy hard heart may be softened, thy spiritual diseases may be cured; and, weak as thou art, thou mayest be able to hold out to the end. Those that complain of unbelief, must look up to Christ for grace to help them against it, and his grace will be sufficient for them. Whom Christ cures, he cures effectually. But Satan is unwilling to be driven from those that have been long his slaves, and, when he cannot deceive or destroy the sinner, he will cause him all the terror that he can. The disciples must not think to do their work always with the same ease; some services call for more than ordinary pains.”

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I could say much more concerning this issue, but then I would have to write a book. For now though, I hope I got my point across. Domestic violence and abuse call for drastic spiritual measures. Meditate on scripture that pertain to your particular situation, fast and pray for deliverance. Fighting with your abuser will not yield the positive results you are hoping for. Give God a chance to change your circumstances His way. Be diligent in seeking Him, and do not lose faith and hope.

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Fast and pray for your children, your situation, your strength, guidance and direction. And yes, even for your abuser. Your safety is most important, if you can get to safety, do so by all means. Fast and pray for your healing and direction once you have separated.

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Read the Bible and learn of our common enemy. He is not a horned devil in a red suit. He is evil, of the spiritual realm, and wicked. His fury is increasing in the world for he is a defeated foe. But we who are alive still have to contend with his wiles. The blood of Christ has won our victory, and Satan is hell bound. Eventually the god of this world will trouble us no more.

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Jesus is our Victory. The battle has already been won. Don’t allow Satan to convince you that the cross meant that Jesus lost the battle for our souls. It may not seem so, but we are on the winning side. No matter who the devil uses to crush our faith – abusers, false preachers, fake friends, disloyal family members – we must stand spiritually strong. The battle is more spiritual than fleshly.

“IT IS WRITTEN!”

Note how Jesus handled the devil and do the same. Our Savior rebuked our adversary with the Word of God.

CAUTION! This is not meant that you should get in the face of your abuser and quote scriptures. When you fast and pray, this is a private matter between you and God. Doing otherwise may bring more harm to yourselves. This is not what I am suggesting or implying. Just wanted to get that out there. I will not be held responsible for anyone taking that route upon themselves.

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New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might.”

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1 THE FALL OF MAN – http://nasb.scripturetext.com/genesis/3.htm

2http://www.markbeast.com/satan/names-of-satan.htm

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NAMES OF SATAN

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Demonic Attack As a Result of Excessive Alcohol Consumption

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CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT THE CHARACTER OF SATAN

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Preachers

“Satan does not usually do his own dirty work. He works through agents. God has sent true preachers, apostles, and prophets, so Satan makes counterfeits — false teachers, apostles, and prophets.”

2 Corinthians 11:13-15 — False teachers do not appear as false teachers or no one would believe them. They are “deceitful workers” who appear as ministers of righteousness.”

“A man who is clearly an atheist or grossly immoral would not fool many religious people. But a good moral man who seems kind and concerned can teach error and fool people decent and devout people.”

Isaiah 5:20 — Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil. Yet that is Satan’s favorite trick. His workers are wolves in sheep’s clothing” (Matt. 7:15).

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“You are of your father the devil, and you want to do the desires of your father. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth because there is no truth in him. Whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies.”

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Just as it is written,
“FOR YOUR SAKE WE ARE BEING PUT TO DEATH ALL DAY LONG;
WE WERE CONSIDERED AS SHEEP TO BE SLAUGHTERED.”

“But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:36-39

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Boys’ death: an act of evil

“Thanks for putting the word “evil” on the front page with reference to the two innocent boys murdered be their evil father. Let’s acknowledge the existence of evil. Let’s not try to understand it or negotiate with it. Let’s just fight against it.”

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The Danger Assessment

The Danger Assessment helps to determine the level of danger an abused woman has of being killed by her intimate partner. It is free and available to the public. Using the Danger Assessment requires the weighted scoring and interpretation that is provided after completing the training. The Danger Assessment is available in a variety of languages.

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http://www.spiritual-side-of-domestic-violence.org

No portion of this web site may be copied, edited, or used in any form without prior permission.

© Spiritual Side of Domestic Violence Org., 20092012
All rights reserved.

 
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Posted by on February 8, 2012 in SATANIC INFLUENCE

 

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THE HOLIDAYS JUST GET TO HIM

By Terry Loving

Hebrews 2:9 “But we see Jesus, who was made a little lower than the angels, now crowned with glory and honor because he suffered death, so that by the grace of God he might taste death for everyone.”

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In times past I was big on holidays, but not anymore – too commercialized. I performed all the traditional rituals my family passed down, until one day I decided, “Enough!” As I studied the Bible and learned the truth about Christmas and pagan holidays, I was set free from the stressful rituals, and spending money I could not afford to spend.

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Thanksgiving Day I will cook a meal and break bread with family. Giving thanks is something that we should do all year long; even in the midst of trials we can name our blessings. Because most family members are off from work, this is a good day to get together.

No doubt, the holidays can either be pleasant or stressful. In the case of domestic violence, many people dread this time of the year. The abuse takes place throughout the year, but somehow the holidays add fuel to the fire. Personally, I believe that many abusers use the stress of the holidays to excuse their violence. On the other hand, commercialization and the present economy will raise the incidents of violence in American homes.

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For numerous households, plenty and abundance is a memory. Agencies that feed the homeless and less fortunate are experiencing massive increases of people who are in dire situations. Many children will not have Christmas as times past; for mom, dad or both have been laid off from their jobs. The stress level in volatile homes has risen, and domestic violence shelters are filled, or filling to their capacity. Violence is on the rise in America, especially in our homes.

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Also during the holidays, much alcohol and other mind altering substances are abused. Unfortunately, too many abused women will excuse their beatings as, “The holidays just get to him.” The financial stress and strain may be a reality, but the violence is still a choice. The children may have to do without this Christmas; however, this is no reason for explosive tempers and abuse. Having a family discussion about the reality of your situation is much better than lashing out in pride. Men especially have a difficult time when they cannot provide for their families. They feel less than men, and feel that they let their families down. Drinking alcohol will not dissolve those feelings. They will resurface, and any little irritant will be an excuse to exhale with violence and abuse.

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The only “tip” that is a sure bet to avoid violence during the holidays is to not be around the abuser. Whether this means leaving abuse, or agreeing to have separate holidays, there aren’t many ways around it. If the track record of his behavior dictates that he gets more violent during the holidays, you can bet this holiday will be no different. And most times, what “gets to him” are usually things that are minor or stupid. Anything for release – abusers are not choosey. Accepting the abusers apology the next day is easier than leaving in most cases. And the “stress of the holidays” will be another excuse to abuse and ruin what could be a warm family gathering.

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America has commercialized holidays to the point of dire consequences. In relationships, we tend to push each other to “Do more!” To erase the sadness on the children’s faces, a mother may push the father to “find a way” to get presents for their offspring. A father may spend what little the family has on booze and drugs. Afterwards he may feel guilty; however, the family’s disappointment fuels his excuse to be violent and abusive. After all, the alcoholic feels that his family should understand that he “has a problem.”

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There are numerous scenarios that plague many homes during the holidays. I remember many a Christmas when our home was wrecked by violence. Alcohol was always present in our home, and more so during the holidays. It is a horrible nightmare for a child to witness violence in the home – especially on a day they wait for all year for joy and presents.

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I know many of my readers will disagree, but hey, I am all about truth. December 25th was never proven Biblically that this is the day of our Lord’s birth. There is an ongoing disagreement as to the time of year Jesus Christ was born, and under what conditions. Most of all, the Bible does not endorse December 25th as a Holy day, or a day to be celebrated or acknowledged. I will never understand why we give gifts to one another on this day. It isn’t our birthday, and what gifts do we give to Christ? Is He acknowledged in most homes – I think not.

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Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible

“For unto you is born this day,…. Day is here put for a natural day, consisting both of night and day; for it was night when Christ was born, and the angels brought the tidings of it to the shepherds. The particular day, and it may be, month and year, in which Christ was born, cannot be certainly known; but this we may be sure of, it was in the fulness of time, and at the exact, season fixed upon between God and Christ in the council and covenant of peace; and that he was born, not unto, or for the good of angels; for the good angels stand in no need of his incarnation, sufferings, and death, having never fell; and as for the evil angels, a Saviour was never designed and provided for them; nor did Christ take on him their nature, nor suffer in their stead: wherefore the angel does not say, “unto us”, but “unto you”, unto you men; for he means not merely, and only the shepherds, or the Jews only, but the Gentiles also; all the children, all the spiritual seed of Abraham, all elect men; for their sakes, and on their account, and for their good, he assumed human nature; see Isaiah 9:6.”

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Technically, if at all acknowledged, Christmas should be a day of atonement:

“The characters of this new born child follow, and which prove the tidings of his birth to be good, and matter of joy:

a Saviour; whom God had provided and appointed from all eternity; and had been long promised and much expected as such in time, even from the beginning of the world; and is a great one, being God as well as man, and so able to work out a great salvation for great sinners, which he has done; and he is as willing to save as he is able, and is a complete Saviour, and an only, and an everlasting one: hence his name is called Jesus, because he saves from sin, from Satan, from the law, from the world, from death, and hell, and wrath to come, and from every enemy…”

A “Savior” was born to redeem the souls of sinful mankind, and establish an eternal relationship with God the Father. The day that Christ was born was not a day of an exchange of gifts. The gifts that were “presented” were given to the baby Jesus:

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THE VISIT OF THE MAGI

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“After coming into the house they saw the Child with Mary His mother; and they fell to the ground and worshiped Him. Then, opening their treasures, they presented to Him gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh.”

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Where do we get the idea that we are to go in debt, to give sometimes – useless gifts to one another? What gifts do we offer Christ on this day? What sacrifices? What honor? Sadly, we do not honor ourselves or others that Christ died for. Homes are wrecked on this day by violence, and one of the excuses is financial poverty. Parents are stressed to the max because they cannot buy gifts for their children; children are sad because they have no tree, nor gifts to open on Christmas day.

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If celebrating Christmas is your thing, I am not knocking you. I am telling it like it really is. The truth hurts sometimes, but it must be told just the same. We would have fewer things to fight about in our homes if we separated our lives from the world. When we buy into the hype that we should live a certain way, possess an abundance of things, and try to keep up with our neighbors, we are headed for trouble.  Satan is the god of this world, and he has done a magnificent job duping mankind through greed and materialism. The marketing world seduces our children, and they plead for material things that parents cannot afford. We go into debt to buy things that cannot satisfy, and we can hardly pay the light bill. The Bible says that “godliness with contentment is great gain,” – what a beautiful, peaceful lesson to be learned. Here is another way of looking at this truth:

Proverbs 15:16 “Better a little with the fear of the LORD than great wealth with turmoil.”

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Not only does violence in the home increase during the holidays, but within our shopping malls. People do some crazy things like camping outside of stores to be the first in line for bargains. When the doors finally open, supposed civilized human beings trample one another, and literally fight over toys and other merchandise they set their sights on. Shopping rages cause harm to innocent people, such as the case with the woman who pepper sprayed other customers at a Walmart.

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What in the world are we teaching our children? Our Lord said, “It is more blessed to give than receive.”

It is more blessed to give than to receive: it seems they were words often used to his disciples. The opinion of the children of this world, is contrary to this; they are afraid of giving, unless in hope of getting. Clear gain, is with them the most blessed thing that can be; but Christ tell us what is more blessed, more excellent. It makes us more like to God, who gives to all, and receives from none; and to the Lord Jesus, who went about doing good. This mind was in Christ Jesus, may it be in us also.”

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If the holidays “set him off,” – or her – perhaps it is time to rethink the holidays.  There is no excuse for abuse, and holiday pressures can only add to volatile situations, if they are allowed to.  Leaving abuse may not be an option, and avoiding the violence may be impossible if the abuser has not repented, and changed his ways.

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In addition to the holidays, the cold weather brings everyone indoors, and there is more family interaction.  Sometimes this is a good thing, and other times this is a match waiting to be struck – with flickering flames that escalate to violence and abuse. Not everyone can tolerate too much family togetherness.  During the holidays the kids are home, bickering and getting on each others nerves; Dad wants peace and quiet when he comes home from work, and mom is plain wore out. And let us not forget the family members that don’t get along with your spouse, or girlfriend – another source of tension.

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I do not have any tips to avoid violence during the holidays – except leave if possible.

However, I will offer some suggestions that may help. If the whole family is onboard, that makes it all the better.

  1. Volunteer at a homeless shelter, nursing home, soup kitchen or anywhere your assistance will be welcomed.
  2. Make home-made gifts if you cannot afford to buy them. (They are treasured more).
  3. Play board games as a family
  4. Get out the cook book and try new recipes
  5. Avoid friends and family that spark tense feelings
  6. Find outdoor activities to do as a family – even in the cold – for a little while
  7. Remind each other of how blessed you are for what you have (make it a game and the winner with the longest list gets a prize) – this way as your list grows, your family will become more aware of how blessed you really are compared to others.
  8. If you lost your job or your home, beating up family members will not bring them back. You will lose much more – their respect.
  9. Sell some of your unwanted possessions to bring in money
  10. Last but not least, draw closer to God.

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If possible, get back to what is important, love and family.  If this list is too simplistic for your situation, by all means make a safety plan. Teach your children to dial 911, and be prepared to leave for a place of safety. Program your phone to speed dial the police, a friend or family members for help. Even if you cannot stay on the phone, if you dial 911 and hang up, the police will most likely call you back, and come to your home. Leave the phone off the hook if possible. Here is a link to a woman who successfully left abuse. She lists many ways to prepare for your exit from a violent home. Click here for more.

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I will never add to this list of suggestions to walk on eggshells. You do that enough throughout the year. You are not to blame for the outbursts and the violence.  Your abuser may use the holidays as more ammunition to exhibit abuse, but the blame rests with the abuser completely.  Stay safe.

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1 Peter 4:7 “The end of all things is near. Therefore be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray.”

Police say domestic violence increases during holiday season

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Domestic Abuse Escalates with Holiday Season

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Studies Show Domestic Violence Decreases During Holiday Season

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Holiday Stress Brings Anxiety and Abuse

“SAD, or seasonal affective disorder, also afflicts some individuals during this time of year. SAD is a type of depression associated with the low light conditions experienced during long, dark winter months.”      (No excuse for abuse)

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North American Domestic Violence Shelter Locations

Undisclosed locations to protect the abused.

SAMPLE SAFETY PLAN – TO LEAVE ABUSE

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Why Abusive, High-Conflict, Personality-Disordered Women Frequently Ruin Christmas

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UNNECESSARY AGGRESSION DURING THE HOLIDAYS – SAD

Police pepper spray rowdy shoe shoppers in Seattle

“SEATTLE (AP) — Police used pepper spray to break up fights among pushing and shoving customers waiting outside a Seattle area mall to buy the first Nike retro Air Jordan basketball shoes that went on sale early Friday.”

“Across the country, at least four people were arrested at a suburban Atlanta mall after a crowd of customers broke down a door before a store selling the Air Jordans opened.”

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Ga. police: 4 arrested in mad dash for Air Jordans

“Officers said they had to break a car window to get two toddlers out after a woman went in after the shoes. They said she was taken into custody when she returned to the car.”

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New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“And the great dragon was thrown down, the serpent of old who is called the devil and Satan, who deceives the whole world; he was thrown down to the earth, and his angels were thrown down with him.”

1 Peter 5:8 “Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”

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Posted by on November 28, 2011 in EXCUSES FOR VIOLENCE/ABUSE

 

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Ebenezer pastor calls Davis execution ‘moral, spiritual disaster’

By Terry Loving

ATLANTA — Days after the execution of convicted cop killer Troy Davis, one of Atlanta’s most prominent spiritual leaders used part of his Sunday sermon to bring attention to what he calls an injustice.

“This was a moral and spiritual disaster unfolding before our very eyes,” said the Rev. Raphael Warnock, pastor of Atlanta’s historic Ebenezer Baptist Church.”

“Davis was executed Wednesday for the 1989 murder of police officer Mark MacPhail in Savannah.”

“The fact that the state of Georgia managed to execute Troy Davis in the face of this lingering doubt does not mean that that was the right answer. It simply means that we have a whole lot more work to do,” Warnock told parishioners. 1

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This post is not an attack concerning Pastor Warnock, but a deep wish within my soul. I wish that all pastors would use part of their “Sunday sermon to bring attention” to the “injustice” of domestic violence and abuse. But they don’t – concerning this issue – they are silent.

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This article refers to this pastor as a “prominent spiritual leader,” does he not have enough clout to address this issue? Forgive me if he has, but I haven’t read a news article about him or any other Bible Belt preacher condemning violence and abuse in our homes – especially “Christian” homes. A few may have briefly touched on this issue, but not many are doing anything about it.

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He also stated, “What is absolutely certain is the MacPhail family’s pain and deep sorrow. What is still absolutely uncertain is Mr. Troy Davis’ guilt,” said Warnock.

I will take this one step further. What is “absolutely certain” is the fact that many parishioners and their families are also suffering “pain and deep sorrow,” day after day, after day, after day – due to domestic violence and abuse.  Many of the abused sit in pews faithfully each Sunday, Wednesday or whenever they can hoping to hear a brave minister of God condemn oppression in the home. Day after day, week after week, month after month, year after year – they are disappointed. What is “absolutely uncertain” is whether or not they will escape the abuse alive.

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I watched the news as Al Sharpton led a crowd of demonstrators to decry the execution of Troy Davis. This wasn’t a wrong thing to do – but where are the leaders when it comes to domestic violence and abuse that are destroying our families, our children, our society, and most of all – our spiritual witness for Christ? As he motioned to the crowd, “Come on” – I envisioned the crowd holding signs saying “NO MORE ABUSE!” – And Sharpton leading the way to do something about this travesty. Sadly, our “spiritual leaders” – and I might use that term loosely these days – pick and choose their fight, rightly so – free will. However, if your fifteen minutes of fame won’t make any difference to hurting people, what good is it? Just because a minister is connected to or pastoring a mega church, well – it doesn’t mean a hill of beans to God. My soul is filled with righteous indignation today – very sorrowful over the plight of the state of America – my beloved country.

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And here’s another thing, Eddie Long paid millions of hush money tithes to keep his evil a secret. I get angry when I think about it, not that I made any contributions. But this is the thing. That money could have been used to serve the very community that put it in his control in the first place. It could have purchased several franchises to give many unemployed persons a job. It could have been used to get some of these young thugs off the street, employ them so they won’t have excuses to break in their neighbors home anymore.

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Our people are preying upon one another, stealing from senior citizens who worked all of their lives. Young thugs are terrorizing neighbors, breaking in their homes at gun point, and wreaking havoc upon society at an alarming rate. The prisons are quickly filling up with young blacks that believe violence is the answer to life’s ills, and conflict resolution equates to shooting and killing their own kind. Young males that should be in high school or college are parked in neighborhoods scouting out which home they are going to burglarize next. They don’t go into the rich white neighborhoods with that nonsense, they destroy their own people.

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What do you have to say about these “moral, spiritual disasters” preachers? No comment? Not surprised. Ill-gotten gain leads to prison and death. If the parents abandon their children, they should be able to come to the, cough – “house of God” for guidance. The Book of Proverbs is a great place to start. But if you don’t address their needs, no amount of preaching will penetrate their hearts. You will keep collecting tithes – living large – and swear by God you are preaching truth – when God is not please with many of you in the pulpit.

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Contact the news stations and tell them you are ready to go head to head with domestic violence. Well, unless of course you are guilty yourselves. If not, why not? I cried for my people today. I cried for the world today. My heart is full – and I am fed up. Christians are not in this world for personal comfort only. We are at war, and we are here to be a light. How can a dark world see Jesus, when we make a mockery of the One who can make a difference in America, and our lives? There are thousands of Troy Davis’ in prison, headed to prison, and crying out for guidance and love. Will anyone help them before they become a statistic of our judicial system?

My heart is broken. And I will be glad when all that should and will be saved are saved so Jesus can end the madness. Judgment will begin with the household of God. Are you ready?

Yes, Pastor Warnock – I agree – “…we have a whole lot more work to do.”

I always read the search terms that people use to find my site – this one I found today, “sad at church.” This should not be!

Domestic violence = INJUSTICE.

It is a dark day in America.

Peace

1 http://www.wsbtv.com/news/29295566/detail.html

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ANTI-JUSTICE IN AMERICA

 
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Posted by on September 25, 2011 in NO JUSTICE IN AMERICA

 

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THEY WHO HURT OUR CHILDREN

By Terry Loving

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
But Jesus said, “Let the children alone, and do not hinder them from coming to Me; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

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There was a time when we had to shelter our little girls. And now, no child – male or female – is safe from sexual predators – in and out of the church.

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The following question from a news commenter concerning Eddie Long prompted this post:

“Why are our children harmed by those whom we teach them to trust?”

It is no secret that children are sinned against more by someone they know personally – mother, father, step-daddy, siblings, uncles, aunts, grand-dads, friends, clergy, teachers, etc. Looking back, my own mother had whatever flaw that allows a mother to trust just any one around her children. She was forever introducing strangers as grafted in family members – “This is your brother.” “Meet your new uncle.” “This is your new step-daddy.” In the case of her boyfriends – the step-daddies – we had to respect them, and do what they told us to do.

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 Kids are not stupid! They know when an adult does not like them. However, it is more difficult for young minds to discern between real and fake love. Child sexual predators are great imposters that know all the evil tricks to lure children into their den of iniquity. Children are born with the capacity to love, and the need for love and acceptance. They are trusting, kind, and they see the world with innocent hearts. Until proven wrong, they think that every grownup is nice, and kind to them. It makes them feel special when they are acknowledged by adults, even if they are strangers.

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 With that said, our children are “harmed by those whom we teach them to trust” because we teach them to trust without judgment. We teach them to trust the wrong people. We teach them that they must respect all adults – without explaining that there are some adults that are not worthy of respect. We teach them to be kind to everyone – without teaching them to recognize ungodly behaviors. We teach them that they must speak when spoken to – and contradict by telling them not to “talk to strangers.” We teach them that just because mommy loves a man, they have to love him too. We teach them many times unwittingly that certain people are above sin – clergy – grannie – grand-dad – and I am sure you get my drift by now.

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 Further, because we do not want to overwhelm them with the reality of a fallen world, we shield them, and allow them to be children for as long as they can – un-interrupted. Well, at least the good parents operate in this manner. I agree that children should not be burdened with the sins that adults commit on a daily basis. However, it is wise to take extra precautions to make sure our children are around “safe” people.

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You know, the Bible doesn’t say these things for nothing:

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“Let everyone be on guard against his neighbor, And do not trust any brother; Because every brother deals craftily, And every neighbor goes about as a slanderer.

GOD’S WORD® Translation (©1995)
“Beware of your neighbors. Don’t trust your relatives. Every relative cheats. Every neighbor goes around slandering.

Proverbs 26:24 A malicious man disguises himself with his lips, but in his heart he harbors deceit.

Proverbs 26:25 Though his speech is charming, do not believe him, for seven abominations fill his heart.

GOD’S WORD® Translation (©1995)
Stop trusting people. Their life is in their nostrils. How can they be worth anything?

GOD’S WORD® Translation (©1995)
Do not trust influential people, mortals who cannot help you.

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The scandal that recently rocked New Birth Church should serve as a reminder to parents to keep a sharper eye on their children. Even before this atrocity, the Catholic Church and many other religious leaders warned us by their actions that our precious children are prey to sexual predators. Too often we let our guards down because one possesses power and position. Let us never forget that these people are mere humans, subject to sin – and should not be excused – especially when they steal the innocence from a child’s heart. It is a very sick, evil, demonic mind that has sex with a child, or molests them in any way.

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 Another commenter stated, “What mother allows her child to go out of the country with other men that she knows only through the church. I was always taught, where my children go, I go.” She was referring to the four young males that were sexual victims of Eddie Long. Only the mothers know their reasoning for allowing the trips, but we can certainly learn from this situation. Not everyone who says, “Lord, Lord” is trustworthy. Therefore, as parents we should listen to God, and heed His warnings. He made us, so He surely ought to know what we are capable of.

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 There is one more post I would like to share with you:

“And not just travel, but as a parent, why were you not talking to them or noticing anything odd, strange or unusual about their personality after being around peers/friends/cohorts/adults/mentors or any one with any influence over them.  People often told my parents that they (my parents) “sheltered” but they always commented back, “Sheltered-Nope…Selective-YES.’”

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I paid the price for my mother’s blind trust. Don’t let this happen to your children.

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The Connection Between Batterers and Child Sexual Abuse Perpetrators
By Lundy Bancroft

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Police: US man decapitated disabled son, 7

“Silverii said the motive was unclear, though Wright told police “that he’d gotten to the point where he was tired of taking care” of the boy, who had cerebral palsy and heart problems, needed a feeding tube, had limited speech and was in a wheelchair.”

“He said when he put his head out by the side of the road it was so the mother would see it when she came by,” Silverii said. He said Wright’s only explanation for doing so was “just that he wanted her to feel stupid when she saw the head.”

“Lirette, 27, told The Daily Comet of Thibodaux that she and Wright had been together for 10 years, but that she had planned for some time to leave him.”

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(Video) “Don’t spare the rod” – when parents kill children in the name of God

parents beat adoptive 7 yr old daughter to death in the name of God

Ungodly Discipline: when God is used as an excuse to abuse, control and murder children”

“She was only 7 years old, lying on a cold slab at the morgue, with welts, bruises, deep cuts all over her tiny body, inside and out. She had been beaten to death on February 13. Not by a stranger, pedophile or serial killer who abducted her but by her parents. Disciplined to death in the name of God.

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Street GRACE: Help End Childhood Sexual Exploitation

The Candy Shop Trailer from Whitestone Motion Pictures on Vimeo.

Film Description

The Candy Shop is a thirty minute film about child sex trafficking. The story is as follows: Jimmy Balcom’s new job selling newspapers is a God-send to a kid working hard to help his family survive during the depression. But then Jimmy figures out what’s happening in the candy shop across the street.  And he is confronted with a choice that no twelve-year-old should ever have to face. Giving his family a better life, or keeping his soul. Doug Jones stars as the Candy Shop owner in this original film from director Brandon McCormick of Whitestone Motion Pictures in conjunction with the Doorpost Film Project.

This film is being made for the Doorpost Film Project, and with support from 12Stone® Church and Street Grace. The film is a Fairytale/Parable about the child sex trafficking epidemic that has overrun our city of Atlanta. We are using the film to not only raise awareness but provoke meaningful action towards this issue taking place in our own backyard.

This plague has gone on for too long, and now we at Whitestone, in cooperation with Doorpost, 12Stone® Church and StreetGrace want to put a stop to it.

This film represents the spearhead of a citywide and possibly a nationwide campaign.
It is not a documentary. It is not a PSA. It is the beginning of a movement.

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Atlanta struggles to fight child prostitution

“In the city of Atlanta, girls as young as 9 years old are being sold for sex, according to interviews with the girls themselves and the women who try to help them.”

“Pimps shower them with gifts, lure them away from their families, and then force them to have sex with strangers, often men old enough to be their father, for just $10 a trick.”

“You can only sell a dime bag once; you can sell a 10-year-old girl over and over again,” Baker said.”

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“Numbers” – Child Exploitation & Sex Trafficking PSA from Ron Dawson on Vimeo.

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Shattering the Silence: Portrait of a Pedophile-Does Sandusky fit the profile?

“Men and women who prey on children sexually do not look scary. They are not the big, bad wolf or ugly stranger slinking or lurking through your neighborhood. They do not stand out for they have mastered the ability to blend in perfectly.”

“Most times, they are friendly, sweet, endearing, kind. How else could they gain your children’s trust? Your trust? They love being around children and the very smart ones know how to have access to children without drawing suspicion. What better place to hide in ‘broad daylight’ while satisfying their deviant, debased appetites than work where there is an abundant supply of children?”

“It is no accident that the Catholic Church has an epidemic of pedophiles. It is no accident that a popular Atlanta pastor was accused of sex abuse by 4 young men who were subsequently paid millions to go away quietly and never speak of those allegations again.”

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Penn State Sex Abuse: latest accuser allegedly Sandusky 5 yr old grandson

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Ohio man accused of prostituting adopted boy

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They Who Hurt Our Children Will Pay!

GIRL-ABUSE-HURTSClick on picture to see more embroidered patches

 

New American Standard Bible (©1995)
“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe to stumble, it would be better for him if, with a heavy millstone hung around his neck, he had been cast into the sea.”

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Posted by on June 26, 2011 in PROTECTING CHILDREN FROM ABUSE

 

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